How To Handle A Man Ignoring You

Sometimes a man might ignore you, to make you realise his importance, and get some more of your attention. At times the reason for his ignoring you might be with an intention, that he’ll become indispensable to you and that you’ll succumb to his desires in order to please him. Initially, when your man starts ignoring you, you tend to come up with such thoughts. You tend to believe this, in the beginning when he ignores you for some time, but when his ignoring gets prolonged, you start getting unsure as to what are his real intentions and reasons of keeping you away from him. Your mind starts dwelling on other things; insecurity regarding the relationship creeps in and you wish that his ignoring you, ends soon. No more are you able to take it lightly; it results into heart ache and anguish.

The suffering you go through when he ignores you is unexplainable. Not only is it awfully unbearable, it even harms your self esteem and psyche to quite an extent. When he is ignoring you, the first question that comes to your mind is that, “has he lost interest in you?” The possibility of his being attracted to someone else looms large on your head. You try all the possibilities that might help you to get his attention back. Still if you don’t find taking interest in you and he keeps ignoring you, then it is better to leave him and understand that you have to handle your life without him. His thoughts, if they are still monopolising your mind, have to be pushed back and you have to handle his ignoring you in the most regal way possible. To handle the man ignoring you and make yourself strong and independent is one sure thing which is going to get back your confidence in yourself.

How to handle a man ignoring you?  Mentioned below are points that are aimed at handling the situation in the best possible manner.

1.      Accept the fact that something has gone amiss in the relationship- Try to accept the fact that he is ignoring you. Try to get over the thoughts that he should come back to you and that the things should again be the way they were. Stop waiting for his phone calls. Stop that desire to see him, just for a while. Stop the desire of his replying warmly to your chat initiatives. 

2.      Stop making yourself miserable-  The fact remains that the chances of getting back the beautiful moments are now less. Accept this fact.  If you handle the situation practically, there is a possibility of you coping up with the circumstances in a better way. Be realistic. Try to see the situation from the balanced point of view.  

3.      Ponder on the reasons what made him drift away from you- Just try and review the relationship rationally without being prejudiced. Know what’s gone wrong between you two. If it is something concerning you, and if you can manage to rectify it, you might get back the spark in the relationship. If it is something else on his mind then accept that there is hardly much achievable now.                                           

4.      Try to communicate with him and figure out the reason of his ignoring you.- Try to talk to him and listen what he says.  Think rationally. Don’t jump to assumptions. Don’t pressurise him. If the reasons for his ignoring you are workable then you have won the battle. 

5.      Try once to tell him the feelings you have for him- Go with a clear and balanced mind. Let him know that how much you value his presence and company. Try to hold yourself and try not to be crying or emotional. If he still wants it to be over after listening to you then give him his space and call it quits. Consider his point of view. 

6.      Stop chasing him and apologising- Once it is clear that he wishes to ignore you and doesn’t want to be close to you, stop chasing and approaching him. Don’t go on apologising or persuading him to come back to you. Maintain distance. Mingle with other people, your friends. Look happy and be playful. Don’t look needy. This is certainly easier said than done, but this is one step which you have to incorporate in your life. How soon you can bring yourself in this mode depends upon the severity of your relationship with him.

7.      Use your time wisely- Try to think of ways to spend the ample time you have with you now, because of his absence. Carve out your own identity by engaging in fruitful activities. Try to fill the void. Use time for your advancement. Try to be yourself.  

8.      Don’t complain about him- Don’t be badmouthed. Handle your emotions. Don’t complain or crib about his behaviour in front of his friends or acquaintance. Abstaining yourself from saying badly about him will help you steer clear from his thoughts faster. 

9.      Pat yourself for being strong and for handling the fact that he is ignoring you –If a man is ignoring you for reasons pertaining to your personality or behaviour doesn’t imply that you are not good. You are an individual with your own likes and preferences. If anyone can't get along with you, the sheer reason for it is incompatibility. If your man ignores you, it in no way makes you less attractive or lesser in any other respect. Be confident of yourself and your capabilities.

10. Be hopeful. There is someone better in store for you- If you’ve been capable of taking his ignoring you with a strong countenance, this alone shows the courage and strength you possess. Such an outstanding person like you certainly deserves a partner capable of loving you, valuing you and one who will not at all ignore you. So let the unworthy go, so as to make place for someone better, someone you deserve. That someone who wants you to be a part of his life will make your life wonderful again. 

Passage of time might heal your pain. It might happen that you might get lucky again to come together or it might so happen that you part away forever. If that happens, know that it would be for the better as there is no point in dragging a relationship. The best thing to do will be to handle a man ignoring you in a dignified way, so that the pain is minimized for you.


Picture- Ń–gor

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  1. iam a 25 years old female, i wanna die, men use me by misusing my kindnes. iam tired., iam going to die because i cant hadle this anymore. iam depresed. and the fact that i have been suffering depression for 12 yers now, these men just made my depression level higher. I have lost sight, focus ad vision on every aspect of my life. I NEED HELP…

  2. hi,i have read through whole of this article and iam so much amazed at how wondefully it gives effective tips on dealing with such depressed moments when some loved ones ignore us.The kind of feelings that emerges out of this are simply painful.Thanks a lot for having shared this article,it gave a lot of insight and iam thankful.

  3. Exploring the mystery of life

    February 17, 2011 at 10:37 am

    @ beatrice 
    Everything ends well at the end. If it is not well till now, its not the end… don't worry,B happy …God bless:)

  4. Hey – I once had a boyfriend of over 10 years, he didnt like a decision i made – though i did it nicely, an sulked. My girlfriend and mechanic advised me NOT TO CALL HIM at all. Now this was very hard because we had dated and talked and lunched and dinned very regularly for over 10 years.

    1 month passed and i was in shock he could stay without talking to me for that long, but guess what – after 2 months of not calling – he showed up at my office and wanted back the same day! We even made love that day! . .. Now my girlfriend told me that men dont like women who are “over”
    dependent. They tend to walk all over you, but if you look like you can live your life – he will respect you more and if your relationship was a good one, he will certainly miss you and come back!.. All the best!

  5. Am in love with a girl in my office and we have been friends for 3 months but i find her flirting with my friend even when he already knows that am going out with her. please what do i do i ahve never been in love like this before because i am thinking of marriage. am only 27years ,please advise me. i love her.

  6. Hi,

    Thanks so much for your words of wisdom. I have fallen in love with a man I have only met on the phone. For 7 months he persued me in such an endearing and beautiful way. It was shear bliss. Until he began to tell the story of his life and I began to realize he was from an entirely different class of person than I am. At first when I attempted to get a better handle on his lifestyle choices (gogo bars and such) he gave me the answer I wanted to hear, which was he did that over a decade ago, but doesn’t do that now. His first fiance I later learned was a bartender at a strip club, his next relationship was with a GoGo dancer he met outside of a bar that “a business associate made him go to.” Then he married the GoGo dancer and she soon after divorced him for his assets. The next one was a married GoGo dancer, but that had been over for “a year”.

    I am a professional woman, educated, successful and married with a grown teenager. My marriage is coming to an end, and this man on the phone was the future ex-brother in law of a good friend, so it seemed safe enough in the beginning. But I did not know his past or anything about his choice in entertainment.

    When finally, after 7 months of being charmed and falling in love with him I pressed him on the subject to better understand is this something he does now, he became enraged. He yelled at me and told me he didn’t need to appologize to me for going there. That these women were his friends and “half of them didn’t even take his money.” He said that he went through a hard time with the divorce and this place gave him a safe haven and somewhere to find company and to feel welcome. He said he chose that place because he was a busy business-owner and didn’t have time to go out and make friends. And besides those kinds of places are all over his neighborhood and he couldn’t avoid going there.

    I told him I needed to go. We hung up. I was heartbroken over the conversation and we hadn’t spoken again for almost a month and a half after speaking everyday at least 3 times a day.

    Well, to make a long story short, he left me a message the other day saying that everyone has their limit and he reached his with me. He suggested I “find help” or “religion”. He said that he was very insecure and his self-esteem was low because of the divorce and he felt that I had become a negative influence in his life and that he needed to have only positive influences in his life. That was two months ago and I never heard from him again.

    I was heartbroken and really never understood what happened.

  7. When he ignores you, ignore him. I do this all the time, and I win.

    I can ignore a person for years. :)

    He’ll eventually cave when he wants the sex back, and then you can ignore him for exactly three times as long as he ignored you.

    He never does it again after that.

  8. Oh my!!! I’m doing those things right now!!! This was a total wake up call. THANK YOU!!!

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