Communication is very important in every human relationship especially in marriage. A marriage that lacks effective communication may likely collapse. If you want to save your marriage, it is important that you maintain strong communication with your partner. Though human beings naturally communicate, but for communication to be effective, it is important that you acquire some techniques that will help you. Here are some communication tools to apply in your marriage.
Being the first to response
As it is said, what determines the course of a conflict is the person that responds and not the person that initiates the conflict. What this means is that the manner you respond to provocations by partner determine whether the situation will be worse or not or whether you will end up quarreling with your partner or not. There is the tendency in every man to return bad words with bad words or assaults with assault. But you have to overcome this natural inclination. Learn how to respond gently at the initial time. Your initial response can calm down the situation or worsen it. You can turn away the wrath of your partner by avoid responding harshly.
Applying the principle of physical touch
There is a great soothing power in touch especially when it is apply at the right time. When you touch a partner tenderly, you are appealing to the person's emotion and when emotion has taken over, it is always difficult to annoy the person or wrong the person. However, it is most appropriate the apply this principle before the beginning of conversation or argument. It may not be of any help during a quarrel or an argument depending on a person's temperament. You know the topic to discuss and whether it will give rise to disagreement or quarrel. So, before you begin the conversation, you can apply this principle. There are different ways to apply it. You can hold your partner tenderly by the hand, cross your hand around her neck, sit on his laps or allow her to sit on your laps (depending on the sex), sitting very close to each other so that your body will touch each etc. This type of tender touch bring out loving emotion and thus reduce the possibility of quarrel during talks.
Conversing at the right time
Every time is not good for communication. It is important that you know when to discuss crucial family issues. Certain issues are better discussed at dinner while some are better discussed during bedtime or during family leisure hour. If you want the children to join, the dinner time is the best time. If it is not a topic that they can join, then the dinner is not the best time. You can discuss it when they have gone to bed or when they are in school. It is not also advisable to open up a discussion when your partner is exhausted or feeling sleepy. This is because the person may not give you full attention and you may not like it that way.
Make sure that you are understood
When you are communicating with your partner, it is important that you ensure you are being understood and that you understand him very well. There are signs that show whether you are being understood or not. Look you partner straight at the eyes. A person's understanding shows from the eyes or face. Also check how many times, he or she asks you what do you mean, I don't understand you and similar statements. If he or she asks such questions repeatedly, it simply means that you are not being understood. On your own part, to make sure that you understand your partner, it is advisable to from time to time repeat what he or she said. Such clauses as do you mean this, are you saying that, does it mean that and the likes can be used to ensure that you are following.
Listen to your partner
Communication is not one way traffic. It is a two way traffic or conversation between two or more people. So, don't keep talking alone. Your partner should also talk and when he or she is talking, you should listen to him or her.